For months, I bit my tongue every time my husband, Evan, hit me with his favorite line:
“I work all day. You wouldn’t understand.”
Meanwhile, I was home with two kids under five. Managing tantrums, meals, laundry, and the inevitable 3 p.m. meltdown. But to him? My life was just pajamas and playtime.
“Must be nice to stay home and chill,” he’d smirk as I bathed the kids, packed lunches, and cleared the table after dinner.
And if I ever dared to ask for help?
“I already worked today. You don’t see me asking you to take over MY job.”
The final straw was one night after bedtime.
I collapsed on the couch, rubbing my temples. The house was a disaster, my shirt had dried applesauce on it, and I was fairly certain I hadn’t peed alone in three days.
Evan strolled in, freshly showered, smelling like aftershave, and flopped down beside me. He glanced over, frowning.
“You’re always so tired lately. From what?”
I stared at him. From what?
Oh. Okay. That was it. That was the moment I decided Evan needed an education.
I didn’t argue. Didn’t roll my eyes or launch into a lecture. I just smiled. Waited a week. Said nothing. Did it all. And then, on Sunday night, I handed him a handwritten schedule.
Monday: Your Day Off.
I kissed him on the cheek, grabbed my purse, and headed for the door.
“Wait, where are you going?” he asked, brow furrowing.
“To have a day off,” I replied sweetly. “Like you.”
“But—”
“Everything you need is in the schedule. Have fun!” And with that, I was gone.
I spent the day at a cafe, read a book, got a pedicure, and sat in absolute silence. Bliss. My phone? On silent. No frantic texts from Evan—he could handle it, right?
When I returned that evening, I opened the door to chaos.
Toys everywhere. A sticky stain on the couch. The smell of something burnt hanging in the air. And Evan? He was slumped at the table, hair disheveled, staring into the abyss.
The kids were half-dressed, one with marker on her face, the other eating crackers straight from the box.
Evan slowly looked up. “I don’t know how you do this every day.”
I shrugged, suppressing a grin. “Must be nice to stay home and chill, right?”
He exhaled, rubbing his temples. “I—I didn’t even get through half the list. I had to change Noah’s shirt four times. Emma wouldn’t nap. They fought over a spoon. A SPOON. Then lunch turned into a food fight, and the laundry—oh my god, the laundry never ends.”
I nodded, letting him process it all.
That night, he didn’t just sit on the couch while I bathed the kids. He joined me. He packed the lunches. He helped with bedtime.
And as we collapsed on the couch together, he turned to me and said, “I get it now. I really do.”
From that day on, Evan never used the phrase “I work all day” again.
Sometimes, people don’t understand your struggles until they step into your shoes. That day, Evan finally walked in mine.
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