Mom Argues That Grandparents Need ‘Consent’ To Hug Her 2-Year-Old
Every parent has different ideas about how to raise their child. Some people prefer stricter rules, whereas others are more relaxed, for example. With the advent of the internet, parents worldwide have been able to share which techniques they believe are best for raising a healthy and happy child; some approaches are universally praised, while others spark heated debate.
For example, some parents have taken to social media to share that their children dislike being hugged to the point where they will take extreme measures if a family member tries to hug them. Many of these events have included grandparents.
Many mothers have now taken to social media to express similar sentiments, adding that consent should be required for any family, including grandparents, to show physical affection toward their children.
Brittany Baxter, an Australian mother, has passionately supported this point in a series of TikTok videos, explaining that all grandparents should ask permission before hugging their 2-year-old daughter. She said that no one could demand physical affection from her daughter. This video, uploaded in April 2021, has since sparked debates about whether this practice is fair or valid, with many people joining in on the discussion. There are no two ways about it for Baxter, and her series of videos on why consent is essential, even for toddlers and young children, has gone viral on the internet.
Baxter discussed how her 2-year-old daughter’s grandparents continued to cross boundaries despite numerous warnings. She also mentioned that her toddler daughter understood consent, but the adults didn’t like it and took the boundaries personally. Baxter began one of her TikTok videos, “As a parent, I practice consent with my daughter, and something has been bothering me lately…”
She took her feelings to TikTok, asking, “Can we please start normalizing that kids do not have to kiss and hug adults?”
She explained that she has been teaching her daughter about consent since she was born and that she finds it extremely important “When the adults in her life say things like, ‘What, we have to ask for a kiss and a hug?’ even after I’ve explained why multiple times, it’s unhelpful. When she says no, they say, ‘Oh, she doesn’t love me, my feelings are so hurt,’ and then they overstep her body boundaries anyway.”
She said, “My daughter and her body do not exist to make anyone feel more at ease or loved. It is neither her nor my fault that the older generation has not taken the time to learn how to regulate their emotions/feelings so that consent is not overlooked.”
“No one’s feelings will ever be more important than my daughter’s right to her own body,” says Baxter.
She made it clear that constantly crossing boundaries were something she would not tolerate, as it would be dangerous “going to raise her (daughter) in an environment where 1. She has no idea how to say no, and 2. She has no idea what it feels like to be disrespected.” “Grandparents, do better,” she says at the end of the video.
“If we can’t allow our children to say no and we can’t teach them that it’s OK to say no, how are they ever going to be able to do that when they find themselves in difficult situations where they feel uncomfortable?” Baxter told Sunrise.
While her video received nearly 800,000 views, it received a mixed reaction, according to Baxter, and her comments have since been disabled. “A lot of people are outraged, which I understand; a lot of people have misunderstood the point of the message that I’m attempting to convey,” she told the news outlet.
Before she disabled her comments section, Baxter received encouragement from both men and women. According to Shared, one man commented, “I’m a proud 50-year-old uncle. ‘Would you like a hug, a high five, or nothing?’ I learned early on. Always calm. Always had my back. It is extremely important!”
Others, however, thought she went too far. One woman commented, according to what was shared, “I encourage my 21-month-old to bond (emotionally and physically) with my parents, and she is very attached to them. I don’t understand your rage.”
It is safe to say that Baxter’s views have sparked a debate among many people on both sides.
Which side are you on in this debate? Do you agree that grandparents should ask permission before hugging their grandchildren? Please let us know, and be sure to share this with your loved ones to see what they think.
